7 Unattractive Things Guys Do (Unattractive Traits in a Man)

There are some things we can all agree are serious turn-offs. Here are 7 unattractive things guys do and a few unattractive traits in a man.

Before we start, it’s important to understand what is considered unattractive. Plus, it probably depends who you ask.

What is an Unattractive Man?

An unattractive man is, by definition, not appealing or pleasing to look at.

Clearly the hard definition is not enough to justify someone being unattractive since it’s subjective. However, the majority can agree on a few basic factors.

Note that the definition refers specifically to visuals. Meaning, attraction has nothing to do with personality or feelings.

At first impression this might be true, but it doesn’t paint the full picture.

Let’s take a deeper dive into the real reasons behind it!

7 Unattractive Things Guys Do

The things you say and do can either be a major turn-on or seriously unattractive. Unfortunately, a lot of guys do unattractive things without even realizing it.

Here are 7 things guys do that are a major turn-off…

1. Act Rude or Aggressive

That “macho,” alpha male attitude isn’t as attractive as you think. Being rude, aggressive, or overly confident is not a good look. Period. 

The strongest and most confident guy in the room doesn’t need to open his mouth or draw attention to himself. These macho and aggressive behaviors are really just a sign of insecurity.

Being respectful and helpful are attractive qualities. 

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2. Drink or Smoke Too Much

Everyone likes to have a good time, but excessive drinking and smoking can be one of the most unattractive things guys do.

It’s just not attractive – to anyone.

In one study, women from Belgium looked at photos and bios of 200 men. The guys who said they smoked frequently were seen as less attractive than the non-smokers.

The guys who drank occasionally were also seen as more attractive than the excessive drinkers.

Plus, when you party too hard and too often, you come off as lazy or unmotivated. It’s difficult to be ambitious and hard-working when you’re constantly nursing a hangover.

3. Don’t Communicate Enough

Being too clingy or needy is unattractive, but it’s just as much of a turn-off if you constantly act like you aren’t interested. 

Don’t send a “hey!” text and then take hours to respond. It sends mixed signals, and it can make you look unattractive.

Only start a conversation if you want to continue it.

You’re not playing hard to get. You’re just annoying the other person.

Lack of communication – or none at all – can be incredibly frustrating. 

4. Act Negative

Life isn’t perfect, but if you walk around with a dark cloud over your head, you’re not making things any better.

Some guys look for the negative in every situation. They live in a world of doom and gloom. 

No one likes a Negative Nelly. It’s not only unattractive, but makes you less interesting as well.

People want to hang out with upbeat, positive people.

5. Lack Motivation

Laziness is not an attractive quality in anyone. Sure, everyone needs downtime, and being overly ambitious can also be unattractive.

However, if you have no interest in bettering yourself or you aren’t setting goals, this can be a serious turn-off. And if you aren’t a helpful or cooperative person, that’s also unattractive. 

It’s not about you making enough money to care for someone else. It’s about naturally showing the other person that you have a purpose in life and care about growth.

Check out our post on how to enter monk mode for a guide on how to change this lack of motivation.

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6. Always Too Serious

It’s great to be ambitious and motivated, but if you take everything too seriously, that can be a turn-off too.

You should be able to laugh at yourself and just enjoy life a little.

Having a sense of humor is one of the most attractive traits a guy can have. Being able to make your partner laugh is important.

7. Act Insecure

Acting insecure is one of the most unattractive things guys do according to most women!

Easier said than done, but you can always work on being yourself rather than someone you’re not just to impress others.

Many unattractive traits actually stem from insecurity, like being the “macho” guy, being too clingy, or playing hard to get.

If you’re not confident in yourself and constantly need reassurance, then this can be a major turn-off.

Being confident doesn’t mean being egotistical either. It just means that you’re sure of yourself and know what you want.

What are Unattractive Traits in a Man?

Personality traits are harder to change than your habits or behaviors, but it’s not impossible.

These are some of the most unattractive traits in a man…

1. Lack of Empathy

People want to be seen, heard, and understood.

If you can’t put yourself in someone else’s shoes and understand where they’re coming from, that can be a very unattractive trait. 

When you lack empathy, you can come off as cold or out of touch.

Plus, if you aren’t open to other people’s beliefs or ideas, it can be difficult to maintain intimate relationships.

Even though humans are naturally social creatures, empathy doesn’t come naturally to everyone.

If you’re struggling with a lack of empathy, there are things you can do to change that.

For example, acknowledge someone’s pain and provide encouragement when talking to them. 

2. Unreliability 

No one likes a flaky person. It makes you unattractive and untrustworthy.

Breaking plans or just not showing up at all can be a dealbreaker for a lot of people.

Relationships are built on trust. People need to feel secure and know that they can rely on their partner if needed.

If you’re unreliable, you’ll have a hard time finding someone willing to make a commitment. 

If you say you’re going to do something, follow through and do it. Remember that your actions affect other people.

Related Post: How to Be a Better Boyfriend

3. Jealousy

Contrary to what you may have heard, jealousy is one of the most unattractive traits in a man. In many cases, jealous people are also controlling. 

Jealousy is nothing more than fear that your partner will leave you, and many people use controlling or manipulative behaviors to keep that person around.

This loops directly back to being insecure, which we’ve already established is not great.

Just to be clear – we’re talking about extreme cases of jealousy here. It’s normal for people to get a little jealous if someone else has eyes for their partner.

However, it’s an entirely different story if jealousy leads to aggressive and controlling behavior.

4. Gaslighting

Few things are less attractive than a guy who constantly gaslights his partner.

Gaslighting is manipulative behavior that’s used to control the other person by questioning their sanity. 

Guys who engage in this type of behavior dismiss their partner’s feelings, make their partners doubt reality, never apologize when they’re in the wrong, and never hold themselves accountable for their actions.

Gaslighting is a serious problem, and it’s one that should be dealt with through therapy if done often. 

The Takeaway

Everyone has an unattractive quality or trait. After all, no one is perfect.

However, recognizing our flaws and working on being a better person can be a serious turn-on.

If you have any of these traits or engage in these behaviors, a little self-reflection and personal development can go a long way in helping you grow as a person.

Hopefully you’ve learned what you can do as a man to better yourself and ultimately appear more attractive to others.

Thanks for reading!